Scared-Phobia


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I still remember to this day, The trigger of my phobia. I’ve heard it is very unusual for people to remember their trigger. They usually suppress the memories. But I remember it as clear as a day.

It was about 10 years ago, I was in Karachi (Largest city of Pakistan) to meet some relatives,  we had just arrived there and on our way from train station to their house.  My Aunt came to pick us up and I was sitting in the car in the back seat with my mom. We came across a U-turn and my aunt told my mom that a man was killed right there. She went about telling the whole story of the murder(which I don’t remember clearly) as I listened to it.

That was the day after which I started to get scared. Really scared. I was scared of being alone in the dark. Afraid that something or someone will get to me. Kill me. I don’t know what this phobia is called medically to this day. But all i know is, it wasn’t just a normal fear. I was paranoid !
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I was scared of everything that moved in the dark. I always thought there was something lurking in the dark waiting for me to close my eyes and it’ll jump out and grab me.
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And the worst part was it wasn’t only when I was alone, even if somebody was sleeping with me I would always feel a presence with me. I would still be as much scared.

I guess I can say that I was actually scared that somebody was gonna kill me.
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I can’t count the sleepless nights I spent rolling in the bed. I was scared even to roll to my side as I was sure something will attack me if my back is to it. So I always laid on my back, face facing upward and trying to look side to side with my two eyes (although at that time I wished I had four eyes so I could look everywhere).

For more than 10 years,  I had to endure this fear. It was really hard for me to cope with it. I still remember the fear and the darkness I felt lying on my little bed. Wanting to sleep so bad but wasn’t able to.
Everything in the dark was my enemy and I had to fight a really hard battle.

I was afraid to watch any horror movie or drama or anything like that.
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I don’t know why but with time that fear started to subside. I started to become less and less conscious about it as I got more involved and busy with my studies.
I was afraid to watch horror movies as I mentioned before, but when I saw it once, I found out I wasn’t that scared of them anymore.

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I was searching for a reason, Why do we fear? I came across this answer:

Most fears are nothing but movements of thoughts. A thought is a language that we give for words, pictures and feelings. Put in a different way, a thought is just a movement of word, picture and feeling… You interpret a thought in your mind in a language that you are afraid, and you experience fear.

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As I thought more and more about it and tried to find my answer I realized why that phobia faded away.

My phobia started when I was very little, maybe 8-10 years old, usually kids of that age don’t have much to do. Studies are not that hard and there isn’t any other personal life problem, you are just so in over yourself. All you do all day is THINK!

Think about stuff…any stuff…and considering above explanation of Why do we fear, my over-imaginative mind started to imagine uncontrollably. I was little, I had nothing really to do then but as I grew up , got busy with my studies and other life problems, my mind didn’t had any space left to think about the fear too. So as I got busier and busier, the fear started to fade away.

It doesn’t mean its completely gone, its there somewhere. It takes over sometimes. But its normal, I think everybody gets scared once in a while so I’m not that worried about it anymore.

Everybody has some kind of fear. It can be a fear of being alone, fear of some animal, fear of losing someone. Admit it, EVERYBODY has fear of something but the key is not to let it rule you. You have to learn to overcome it,find the root cause of the problem and then take one step at a time.
You’ll get there one day. As i have. I’m sure!
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(Image credit: Google)

http://dailypost.wordpress.com/2013/10/10/daily-prompt-frightening/

Slang? No,Thank you!

Daily Prompt: 2100
http://dailypost.wordpress.com/2013/09/26/daily-prompt-future-2/

The language of the future: what will it be like? Write an experimental post using some imagined vocabulary — abbreviations, slang, new terms.

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16_chat_pillows_traversing_popular_internet_slangs_1
Ah, why would daily prompt give us this challenge? Seriously? Like the imaginary  language these days isn’t bad enough ?

Imagined vocabulary ? Like the vocabulary today, distorted by the so called SWAGGERS isn’t enough ?

I sincerely hope that through this challenge some new word doesn’t take life and get viral on the Internet, making our lives miserable.

‘SUP ? This is how some baggy-pants-hanging-down-their-asses guys and gals ask each other of their day. I mean seriously??? You can’t just say HEY or HI or How are you, how was your day,how are you doing or even just simple Whats up? would suffice.
But NO, they have to say it like : ‘SUP !

Then there is HBD . Really? I mean really?
Is it so hard to write three words ? Happy Birth Day ? Does this really take so much of your energy that you just have to retort to saying HBD ?

OH MY GOD, here comes YOLO !!!
I don’t even want to talk about the absurdity of this. This is a word which was invented for stupid people to give them a chance to DO stupid things!
They jump out of a running car, from the top of a roof, swing from the chandelier, run around the neighborhood naked or across the whole room and then fall on their bums breaking a bone or two chanting YOLO !

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I  can go on and on and on about the trending vocab these days and daily prompt wants us to give a glimpse of a future as well ?

Uhm…NO thank you !

I’ll not take part in committing crime against the humanity by destroying the little left dignity of this beautiful language.