We Bleed (To Transform)

(Transmogrify)
img_20150410_175947

I don’t know what it is about blood. We claim it’s a bad thing yet we can’t stop bleeding. We let others wound us over and over again until gash is a foot deep into our soul. Sometimes we wound others and get wounded in the process.

We clutch tightly to barbed wires of emotional attachments and walk on the burning coals of expectations. And by the end of it when we fall on the ground profusely gushing and wounded to our core, we make promises to ourselves; never again. But as we all know, promises are made to be broken.

The wound is by now infected because you didn’t take care of it well. You didn’t suture it on time and you didn’t put the bandage when you should have. You just let it be; as a reminder of all the things you loved that ruined you.

We fall back onto bed made of thorns of disappointment, exhausted. And bleed some more. We bleed until we can’t. We ache until every muscle in our body refuses to ache anymore. We suffer until pain itself screams in pain. Until the infection has spread onto every small vein and down to our very bones. Until we find ourselves disintegrating- crumbling, decaying, withering.

But,
How else could we have become anew,
If we had not first become ashes?

Advertisements

47 thoughts on “We Bleed (To Transform)

  1. katiemiafrederick says:

    Hi Zee.. hmm..
    somehow i missed
    your post six days ago..
    but sure.. as usual i was in a
    sea of 141K plus words last month..
    hehe.. yes.. surely the heARt IS A muscle
    that must be exercised for empathy and connection
    as spirRiT iN a continuing
    miNd and BoDy
    BaLanCinG
    soUL to maintain
    Love and even expand
    shores that groW wider
    With otheRs too.. even gRains
    of sand that touch noW our skIN of
    FeAT iN loVe oF NatuRe.. MOTheR
    eARth and God as sAme… So many
    inspiraTioNs today to achieve juST
    thAT effort and test of practice won..
    yeah.. and for me @leASt
    i could not leARn
    the purpose
    and meaning
    oF aLL oF this without
    A DaRk niGht oF soUL then..
    lAstinG 66 months.. but noW
    i DancE i SinG a SonG oF LoVe
    and when i need hELp i use a resource
    like YouTube and fiNd thaT iN a sonG likE
    ‘Somewhere’ by Barbara Streisand and ballet
    my way keeping martial arts moves for Masculine
    Strength along with A Divine Ballet as love mY FriEnD..
    and when thiS loVe liVes wiThin.. tHere iS no longer deFEat
    to
    A soUL
    groWn dArk..
    oTheR than thAT
    hope you are doing
    WeLL mY friEnd iN and aS liGht..
    wHeRe
    soMeWheRE
    iS heRE aGain..:)

    Like

  2. Rajagopal says:

    Happy to bleed into creative destruction, for recurring destruction and regeneration cycles, may be the way forward. Thanks Zee for liking some of my offerings and thereby connecting me to your creative world. Best wishes…

    Liked by 1 person

    • Zee says:

      That is so well put; nothing better than to bleed into creative destruction to move forward. Thank you so much for dropping by my blog and leaving behind your footprints. It was a pleasure going through your blog as well. Your visit is much appreciated ☺️

      Liked by 1 person

  3. charlypriest says:

    “Promises are made to be broken”….. Well I can promise you that I took down that post that you didn´t like. My mother almost desowned me again because of that post. I still think was funny, each to his own with the humour.
    By the way, nice piece of writing little devil, it was profound, as all your writings.
    You should make your mission in life to make me more deep and profound……

    Liked by 1 person

    • Zee says:

      Hi Charly, well I’m glad you took it down. Thanks for that, I’m sure Kruti will appreciate it 🙂 your mom is such a gem btw ☺️

      And thanks a lot for appreciating my writing. Just keep reading me more and you shall become deep and profound as well as you already have it in you 😁

      Liked by 1 person

  4. rommel says:

    That is so human. You are speaking the very nature of human conditions. We all have dirt, hidden skeletons, obsession and guilty pleasures. Sometimes it takes control of our life because somehow we let it happen. Something about struggle and pain that make us feel so alive that we let it be even though it gets so dangerous. And some of us, or in some situations, we just thrive in chaos.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Zee says:

      Yes exactly. Sometimes we stay stuck in that cycle of pain because it makes us feel alive, as you said some people just thrive in chaos and sadly they take others down with them sometimes as well. What can I say, I love writing about different Human Conditions. Thanks a lot for keeping up with me always 🙂

      Like

    • Zee says:

      “Seep out the toxicity killing us” that’s so true Prajakta. We have to bleed until we are free of all that poison in our life. Thanks so much for reading ❤️

      Like

  5. litadoolan says:

    Beautiful post Zee. Thank you for these insightful feelings full of humanity. I loved this ‘We clutch tightly to barbed wires of emotional attachments and walk on the burning coals of expectations’. Wishing you a great weekend.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Mabel Kwong says:

    Such a raw and emotional write, Zee. So true that some of us let ourselves get stepped upon and we bleed again and again. It is not that we like feeling the pain, yet we still put ourselves forward. Maybe each time we do, we hope that things turn out differently and that joy – whatever that might be – that we will eventually feel will make us forget the pain. But in doing so, that can consume us, as you so wisely stated at the end. I suppose we have to learn about balance…and realise that we can’t have it all and try to move on. Then again, it is always hard to forgot what we’ve felt. Hope you are well, Zee. Take care ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    • Zee says:

      The gist of it is in the last line of your comment; “then again, it’s always hard to forget what we’ve felt”. We try everything, bleed to our core and fall tired to the floor but somehow it’s the forgetting that’s the hard part. The worst part actually. But we have to understand the bigger picture and know that it’s in ashes that we find ourselves and anew and being able to move on forward to better things. Thank you so much Mable for always being here and sharing your thoughts with me. Much love ❤️

      Like

      • Mabel Kwong says:

        The bigger picture is something elusive because through the hurt, we can’t figure out what we want. But you are right and so well said, “it’s in ashes that we find ourselves and anew and being able to move on forward to better things”. With darkness, we come to appreciate the light more ❤

        Like

  7. trentpmcd says:

    Very powerfully written. Sometimes we do have to die those one thousand bloody deaths to raise back out of the ashes of our former selves. To live is to grow, to renew, to metamorphosize. But sometimes there is no room for that growth unless we have a setback, and we often need to wither to renew and become that caterpillar once again to change into a butterfly. As you said, with the Phoenix, we need to be reduced to ashes to be reborn. Very powerfully written, very sad until those last lines of hope 🙂

    I hope you have a great weekend!

    Liked by 2 people

    • Zee says:

      Thank you so much Trent. As you said, sometimes we have to die those one thousand bloody deaths right in front of our very eyes and feel all that pain to eventually see the bigger picture of things. And eventually become what we are suppose to become; which is hopefully a better version of ourselves and much more wiser. Again thank you for reading and sharing your thoughts with me😇

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Erika Kind says:

    I feel what you write, Zee. That open wound that gets infected because we did not take care enough. Perhaps we still hoped that the one who caused the wound would get back and give it the healing kiss. It did not happen but instead they only soiled it! That’s the problem why it often takes so long that we can let go. So, when we feel wounded we need to communicate it. When we meet deaf ears then we should take care of it ourselves right away before it gets infected 💖

    Liked by 2 people

    • Zee says:

      You are so right Erika, you truly understood the essence of this piece. It’s like after we get wounded we run door to door looking for someone, anyone, who would lend a healing touch but when we come up empty handed it leaves us much more wounded and even infected because we didn’t take care of it soon enough. It takes time to learn to take care of it yourself sometimes 💕

      Liked by 1 person

      • Erika Kind says:

        Right, you described this very well, Zee! I experienced it too. And instead of getting that healing touch that person even poured salt into the wound. It took a while to desinfect it but the wound has healed and whatever that person left at that time fell of with the eschar. Desinfected, healed, left behind! It healed so well that there is not even a scar left. Some are simply not worth to look back! But that should never keep us to still open our heart for others. It would be a shame to miss that special heart which has this healing power that only unfolds when connected with our heart 💖

        Liked by 1 person

        • Zee says:

          Oh wow that is such a blessing Erika; to not even have a scar left as a remnant of that wound. Unfortunately a lot of times even if the wound is filled, a scar always remains. But you are so right about heart with healing power that only unfolds when connected with ours. So beautifully put by you. Thanks so much ❤️

          Liked by 1 person

          • Erika Kind says:

            Healing takes time and perhaps the scar does not disappear. But we will think differently about that scar. Sometimes it was necessary to push us into a different direction. In the end, that scar is displaying that point in life when something beautiful was finally able to arise from what was before! Huge hugs, Zee 💖

            Like

A chocolate bar for your thoughts?!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s