Words

Weekly Photo Challenge: Alphabets

BTB

Forgive the typo mistake with the spelling of *Boundaries (P.S *hint hint with the picture*)

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve tried. Truly tried to write how I feel. To put all the realizations into string of words. But have failed miserably at it every single time. So many times I’ve typed words and then watched them fall short to my sentiment. I don’t know what to say anymore, how to say it that would describe exactly how I feel. Maybe someday. Maybe someday I will be able to cram my feelings into words and put them onto paper for the world to see. Till then I will keep trying, I will write and then re-write, delete and then backspace. But I promise you I will try until the world knows how my raging heart crashes against my rib cage, how the storm in my brain collides into my skull, how the blood in my veins scrapes against my skin and flushes it with red.

I will write words, Smith them down. For love is infinite and so are they.

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79 thoughts on “Words

    • lifeconfusions says:

      This is so true Suyash. Sometimes all you need is to look at someone close enough and you will see colors of emotions and feelings right there screaming for attention.
      Thank you for reading my words ๐Ÿ™‚

      Like

    • lifeconfusions says:

      I will definitely agree with you, we are all eventually drawn towards Him and can only find peace there.
      Thank you so much for dropping by for a read, I appreciate that very much.
      Have a great day ahead โค

      Like

  1. khansana1000 says:

    ๐Ÿ™‚ We all feel it that way , keep trying and you will one day ๐Ÿ™‚ I like to read your posts and I feel they are expressed really well but it is hard to satisfy the writer within you ๐Ÿ™‚ I know I know ๐Ÿ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    • lifeconfusions says:

      That is right Sana, as it is said we are our own worst critique and sometimes we can downplay ourselves way too much. But I’m glad that I can express and write what I’m feeling, even if it’s a small part of the whole, it’s something. ๐Ÿ™‚
      Thank you so much ๐Ÿ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Jimi Fuchsia says:

    You’re always so good with words Zee! But I get not being able to put everything you feel into words. Sometimes I feel like I’m only able to express a small part of what I’m feeling but I think its okay because it keeps me writing ๐Ÿ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    • lifeconfusions says:

      That is a great thought Jimi, Even if we are expressing a part of what we are feeling, it’s better than not expressing at all. We are getting something on paper, it might not be perfect but I think it can be enough to be understood. It still provides us with a way to let it all out and keeps us striving for more. ๐Ÿ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

    • lifeconfusions says:

      And man did he (Hemingway) say the truth! I often consider writing bleeding openly on paper, raw and bare. Sometimes an absolute necessity to feel free.

      Thank you Prajakta for reading and understanding, that’s all I want โค ๐Ÿ™‚

      Like

  3. stacilys says:

    Ohhhhhh Zee, you have inner longings and feelings that maybe can only be expressed from your heart to the creator. He hears every inner longing. You know that sweetie. However, I would say you to pretty darn good job of pouring your thoughts and feelings out into this blog, my friend. They’re strong and deep, my friend. But I know that within yourself there is more depth, and that’s what probably leaves you frustrated.
    You are beautiful Zee, and your words as well.
    Love and hugs, sweet friend.
    ๐Ÿ™‚
    p.s. I have never seen the full northern lights (the song), but I did get a very slight glimpse of them in white when I was living in Ottawa. I think my mom’s seen them, as she used to live only about 100 miles from the Arctic circle. I’m sure that would be a spectacular show, don’t ya think?
    โค โค โค โค

    Liked by 1 person

    • lifeconfusions says:

      Oh Staci it’s like you heard my heart !! Getting to see Northern lights is one of my life dreams, I find them so fascinating, stunning, magical and so much more. I wanna see the light display of “Aurora” one day, I wish one day I would !! Oh how I wish!! Your mom must have been so lucky to live nearby such a spectacular show! ๐Ÿ™‚

      And as always I will agree with you Staci, you are so absolutely right. He hears everything. It’s said that “God is closer to you than your jugular vein.” ๐Ÿ™‚

      Thank you so much Staci for always being here for me and being the best support. You have no idea how much I value our friendship. So much love to you โค โค

      Liked by 1 person

      • stacilys says:

        Awwww, and I so value your friendship too Zee.
        I would love to see the Northern Lights. I just don’t want to experience the cold though. hahaha. Brrrrrr. I’m a huge wimp when it come to cold. Those lights dancing up in the heavens would be spectacular though, wouldn’t they.
        Much love and many hugs sweetie.
        ๐Ÿ™‚ โค

        Liked by 1 person

  4. Mabel Kwong says:

    Oh, Zee. This is another beautiful write up from you. My favourite line is the last one, “I will write words, Smith them down. For love is infinite and so are they.”

    I too share your sentiments. Sometimes I find it so hard to put feelings into words. And like you, when it happens I just try to put any word out there…backspace…and try again. A lot of the time I have to tell myself that I’ve done what I can and walk away and do something else. Sometimes, I think to myself that some feelings are only meant to be felt. Period.

    Wishing you well, Zee. Lots of love and hug your way โค

    Liked by 1 person

    • lifeconfusions says:

      That is so well said Mabel, “Some feelings are only meant to be felt.”, you maybe just right, maybe that is why we fail to put them in words despite of our best tries. But I do wish there was a way to share them or to get them out of your system. To have them inside there, motile and crashing can be very frustrating as well. But hey, we can give it our best and from reading you, I’ve guessed you have an amazing talent to put words with such accuracy and so coherently ! ๐Ÿ™‚

      Thank you so much for your beautiful comment, I wish you peace and love dearest! โค

      Liked by 1 person

  5. nataliescarberry says:

    Well, dang, Zee, those last two lines powerfully summed it up pretty darn well. So like the comment by wafflemethis, I think you already did what you set out to do. There is power and passion in your words, and that simply can’t surge through us without a great upheaval. As an infant you had to push and push through excurciating pain to be free of your mother’s womb. Growth is always like that. You are obviously going through one of those stages where life seems to suck bitterly, and it happens to all of us over and over again in life. The trick is to hold on and ride it out to the calmer seas. And know that when you come out of the storm, you will have morphed into a new and stronger Zee.
    So hang tight, baby girl, you can do this!!!! Love you bunches, Natalie ๐Ÿ™‚ โค

    Liked by 1 person

    • lifeconfusions says:

      Awwh you are so right Natalie, I’ve started to realize the same thing recently. All the hard times were conforming to making me this person I’m suppose to be eventually. Although it was a painful process but I do feel it was a necessary thing probably.
      Even if I can’t express everything through my words, I’m glad that whatever comes out is understood. And it makes me glad to know that it can make impact. I have friends like you to thank for it ! ๐Ÿ™‚
      Thank you so much for your constant encouragement and words of love & kindness.
      Much love your way Natalie โค

      Liked by 1 person

  6. plaridel says:

    i understand your frustrations. i assume that english is your second language as i am. like you, i sometimes find it hard to find the right words to express what i want to say. we need to master the nuances of the language to be able to use it effectively. all i can say is let your feelings guide you. that’s the only way i know how.

    Liked by 1 person

    • lifeconfusions says:

      Hi Plaridel,
      I know it might sound crazy but even though English is not my first language, I find it way easier to express my feelings in it than my native one. I don’t why is that, but I can never write the things I write, in Urdu (which is our national language). I’m glad to have way of expression in English though, still it can fall short to my sentiments sometimes.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. charlypriest says:

    Iยดm not into feeling much, I find it a waste of my time plus it just drags you nowhere except to depression. But each person is unique and you gotta understand and respect people that are different. For the most part that is, people that are like that and act upon it towards the others day in a day out it just wears the other person down, I have no use for that in my real life. Have enough with my problems to be constantly bombarded on a day to day basis with whimpers about how this person feels and how ugly life is and e.t.c. I prefer a bit of joy, life is too short. And quite a lot of these people if you try to help them they just keep on going with the same old same old. Just stuck in their own litte world.

    I will say this, you said that you canยดt express your feelings, and I see other commentators say something like feelings are too much that you canยดt really put them into words. Maybe their right, I donยดt agree though. Do you ever re read what you write? Because if nothing else, feelings is something you do extremely well expressing it and comming across to the reader in your writing. You can believe that.

    Liked by 1 person

    • lifeconfusions says:

      I will agree that people who are not thankful can never be really happy and yes it can get really depressing for others when you have the same kind of behavior to wade through life. I believe the key is moderation here. Sure I have tendency to be morbid and depressing with my writing but thankfully I’m not this person with everybody I come across in real life. Writing is like an escape and way to let out the built up frustration or whatever you might wanna call it so I can function normally in the real world. Having said that whatever I write, it does come from a place within but It does not certainly mean I’m this person 24/7 ๐Ÿ™‚

      And maybe I’m good at expressing feelings only in writing, because in person, in real life, I fail to do so. I’ve a very hard time expressing how I really feel, So as I said writing provides me with a way. But it too sometimes fall short to my sentiments but I’m happy with what I have right now ๐Ÿ™‚

      Like

  8. Carisa Adrienne says:

    Zee… I think your words are so beautiful. You have a gift, you can write about things and make people understand what the meaning is for the words. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve talked to my husband about you. He even calls you by you name ๐Ÿ˜‰ My admiration is at its height when it comes to you. I’m not sure if you want to write a piece of your deep soul. Or try to explain your ideas about something.
    I feel you are wiser beyond your years. We always critique our own writing more than others. I believe you may have already written the perfect words… But feel they weren’t (understood) good enough.
    Zee… If I may add 1 other thing. When I read your pieces I become teary eyed because I can feel them. Your words penetrate my heart waves. <3. Love to you, gorgeous! Oh!! 1 other thing…
    I was writing this while playing the song. I have salty tears all over my phone. It's so beautiful. I went to Spotify to download it but it's not there. I'll look for tho!! It's an amazing song. One of my new favs. I just did a post 2 days ago with the words… "Northern Lights.. Light up for Me". This song would of been perfect. โค

    Liked by 1 person

    • lifeconfusions says:

      Carisssssaaa !!! โค Gosh, I love you so much โค You know what, I'm so deeply touched every single time I talk to you, you are the kindest soul I've ever met. Thank you so much for always saying the best things to me, you make me feel so much better. It makes me happy to know that I've friends like you around that understand me even with imperfect words. After all at the end of the day isn't that what we all want? To be understood by people we love. I don't know how to thank you enough for all the you have said! โค

      P.S I somehow knew you'd love the song. Because when I listened to the lyrics, I figured you and I will be able to relate with them, isn't it just beautiful?! This song is available on the Internet, I will find it for you and send you the link! ๐Ÿ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

      • Carisa Adrienne says:

        Yes, to be understood and be heard. I’ve always been called a Devils Advocate. When I was younger I didn’t know what that meant. Now, I take those words as a compliment. It means I look at both situations… Even if one side might be considered wrong. Many times the wrong side comes out on top because they are able to explain their side. People judge so much… And they hear people’s feelings… But they don’t listen to them. Zee, you move me every time with every single word you write. I think it’s because I feel so misunderstood…. And you understand me. It’s a feeling I don’t feel often. Do you know how much I ache to feel understood? It’s always felt with you. I’m sending my love to you today… I adore you immensely. ๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜‰โค๏ธ Also, I’ve had your page up for days… I repeat the song โค๏ธ

        Like

  9. katiemiafrederick says:

    WeLL.. first of aLL
    ah.. oh.. so..
    ironicAlly your
    first statement
    says it all in
    a real nut shell
    of life where people
    are afraid to be free..
    to move.. to truly connect
    and create.. without oppression
    and repression of human senses..
    emotions.. and yes.. sensuality
    as well.. i love the way you
    spell boundries here from
    the beginning and
    a killer of
    creativity
    spell
    check
    can be
    when it comes
    to human creativity
    truly set free in stream
    of conscious being that
    truly is no different than
    Muhammad in the Cave
    where he reaches deep
    inside.. and ‘heres’ the
    voice of God forever
    moreNow.. that is
    WE.. that iS
    timeless
    ageless as
    any real Angel
    can be.. BOUNDries
    are the problem.. and
    moving out of the cave
    of our culture now and
    cultures of the past
    has always
    been the
    human challenge
    but that will never happen
    as long as we and God are
    chained in words my friend..
    and not able to create our
    own words of God
    already gifted
    to uS
    iN so
    much more
    than words and
    human culture as
    we see and feel it now…
    So.. i invite to you to make
    more mistakes of creativity
    my friend.. as when mistakes
    come free..
    so does
    GOD
    as free
    iN uS..
    as Unconditional
    Love of all that is of
    GOD from dArk to
    liGht with no
    beginnings
    or ends..
    whERe the
    gift of PreSent
    becomes the
    gift of now..
    the Gift
    of God
    we
    hU
    maniFEst
    to others
    fREeNOW..:)

    Liked by 1 person

  10. The V-Pub says:

    Maybe your words seem inadequate to you, Zee, but they’re powerful words to me. You’re young, and have so much time to tell the world your story, to share your feelings with us. Somethings cannot be forced! Like a cake in the oven, we wait for it in anticipation. I find solace in a song that speaks for me. I hope that you find some solace in it as well. It’s called Ripple by The Grateful Dead:
    If my words did glow with the gold of sunshine
    And my tunes were played on the harp unstrung,
    Would you hear my voice come through the music?
    Would you hold it near as it were your own?

    It’s a hand-me-down, the thoughts are broken,
    Perhaps they’re better left unsung.
    I don’t know, don’t really care
    Let there be songs to fill the air.

    Ripple in still water,
    When there is no pebble tossed,
    Nor wind to blow.

    Reach out your hand if your cup be empty,
    If your cup is full may it be again,
    Let it be known there is a fountain,
    That was not made by the hands of men.

    There is a road, no simple highway,
    Between the dawn and the dark of night,
    And if you go no one may follow,
    That path is for your steps alone.

    Ripple in still water,
    When there is no pebble tossed,
    Nor wind to blow.

    You, who choose to lead, must follow
    But if you fall you fall alone.
    If you should stand then who’s to guide you?
    If I knew the way I would take you home.

    Liked by 3 people

  11. Erika Kind says:

    Sometimes the feelings are so huge that they get stuck like in a horn, our mind stays empty and we cannot put it into words. Sometimes it is also not easy to express our feelings when we cannot really define our feelings. I don’t know what you want to convey but whatever your wrote by today felt very deep and to tell from your replies to my comments. I seemed to have understood, which again says that you wrote it at least well enough for that.

    Liked by 4 people

    • lifeconfusions says:

      Our mind stays empty as you said or either is filled with so much that you can’t seem to figure out what to put on paper, coherently at least. It’s like a jumble mess. And of course that’s the worst part not being able to define our feelings into something that makes sense.

      Thank you Erika, you are one of those people I know who don’t even require many words to understand others, you have so much wisdom that you could look at me and probably understand ๐Ÿ˜‰ I love you ! โค

      Liked by 1 person

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